What To Do After You’ve Been Betrayed
It might have been your best friend, your partner, your boss, your brother or even your lover. It burns deep inside. You can’t sleep for the anger, the shock and dismay. You may find yourself still not believing it’s happened to you. But it has!
When those we have entrusted with our money, our plans, our strategies, our loyalty or even our love betray us, we feel violated deep inside. We feel crushed. We wonder if we can ever recover from this.
It is at this moment of realization that you will make some of the most important decisions of your entire life. The three most critical choices you will make – whether you realize it or not are: (1) what to focus on; (2) what to believe; and (3) what to expect from this point forward. These three choices will determine the final impact this betrayal has on your life.
A LESSON FROM MICKEY
Most people don’t know that Walt Disney suffered a great business defeat early in his career. While living and working out of his uncle’s garage, Walt Disney had created a cartoon character called “Oswald the Lucky Rabbit” and signed a contract with Universal Studios to create animated short films about the little fury critter that would be shown before the main feature film at theaters. The short films enjoyed great success, but in his youth and naivete, Walt did not realize that he had signed away the rights to the character. When his contract came up for renewal, Universal Studios refused to renew the contract and announced that it owned the exclusive rights to produce films using “Oswald The Lucky Rabbit.” Walt was devastated.
Starting over from scratch, Walt Saturn ST 1600 desperately needed to come up with a new character. The garage he was living in was infested with rats and mice. Instead of sulking in his misery, instead of turning bitter, instead of filing a lawsuit, Walt focused on what he had left - his gifts, talents and abilities - and his incredible imagination. Walt actually made a pet out of one of the mice and kept it in a cage on his desk. Drawing inspiration from his miserable surroundings, Walt created a cute little mouse character that he named “Mickey Mouse.” And the rest, as they say, is history!
THREE CRITICAL CHOICES AT WORK
What made the difference? Walt Disney made the same three critical choices that heroes have made for thousands of years in order to turn tragedy into triumph.
HE CHOSE HIS FOCUS
First, Walt chose his focus. Instead of focusing on his bitterness and anger, instead of focusing on his miserable rat and mouse infested environment, he focused on the next most immediate steps he needed to take in order to survive. He chose to move forward. He chose to focus on what was in front of him, not what was behind him. He focused on the few resources he had left. He poured himself into his work and he started over.
HE CHOSE HIS BELIEFS
Second, Walt chose to believe. He could have decided his career as a cartoonist was over, and that he could never make it in Hollywood. He could have chosen to believe he could not compete against the “big boys” and disappeared into oblivion. After all, at that time, the only movies being made in Hollywood had real live actors, not cartoon characters. There was no full-length cartoon movie industry at that time, and no one knew whether there was even a viable market for full-length cartoon movies. Despite all this, Walt chose to believe, and he chose to keep believing every new day that the sun came up. Through this tenacious belief, and hard work, he single handedly created a whole new industry.
HE CHOSE HIS EXPECTATIONS
Third, Walt chose his expectations. He knew he could create cartoon characters that audiences would
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